Friday, 31 August 2012

AXE Anarchy Island Getaway

How to be uncontrollably charming you ask?

Here are a few ideas,
since I'm being generously nice. *cough*

If you still can't get friendly with the opposite sex, (or the same sex if that's your cup of tea) after following these "guidelines", it's entirely face problem.

I put myself in the shoes of dudes
to try and think like them.
(Trust me, I can think like men quite well. *le wink*)

I guess for ladies, it's quite easy.

1. Get your hair and make up done

Not too much make up because it's a turn off. Guys won't like it when you smile and powder flakes off your face. Dun use too much hair product cause guys like to run their hand through your hair. If it gets stuck somewhere in there, it's a nooooooo. If you don't like to go through the fuss, at least make yourself look clean.

2. Choose a nice outfit

Choose something that makes you feel comfortable. If you're not the revealing type, don't wear deep-V. You'll feel awkward and end up ruining your date. Wear something that you feel confident in.

Oh, remember,

3. Make yourself smell nice

Guys love it when girls smell nice. Especially the hair. (I was told) 

Don't use too much perfume coz it'll kill them.
or make them faint.

Whichever comes first.

I usually just apply a dab on both wrists, behind the ears, and on the neck, and the collarbones. 

Imagine leaning in to talk to the boys, and the smell just drifts over.

Or you can just spray on deodorant and keep yourself feeling fresh while still smelling good. 

That's somewhat easy and would work for guys in general,
but what would make you special?

My advice comes in the form of 2 words,


Not every guy likes the same kinda girl (unless you've got passion in your dress and you ain't afraid to show it show it show it...*cough*)

Well I like to try out different styles. I like it... kinky....? *shifty eyed*

Express youself in different ways. Get the attention before you get the guy.
Think of a pick-up line for every mode you go for, for example:

Seductive mode (?)

Hey honey, wanna go out and have a drink
or go somewhere for some naughty fun?

Emo style... 

Three cuts means I love you darling. 

The girl next door mode 

Hey, I'm your neighbour
and this is crazy,
but I think you're cute
let's go out maybe?

 The wide-eyed act cute girl style

OHEMGEEEE I'm actually like going cray cray over you. 
Wanna go out for din din someday?
Pweety pweez?
*bat lashes*

Hipster style

I'm a bisexual, because being queer or straight is too mainstream. 
But for you, I'd be all three. 

If all fails,
I still have the ultimate mode left...

I call it.....

The Joey mode. 

Hey, how you doin'?

Well there's also one way to keep you in their head all day long.

Sing Call me maybe to them, 
or maybe Gangnam style if the dude likes to ride.
*if you know what I mean*

Ok, jokes aside,
how do I (really) turn my charm on?

It's simple.

1. I let the guy take the lead when he wants to,
2. I laugh at his jokes, and reply with similarly lame ones,
3. I throw in subtle winks at the right time,
4. I don't (usually) need a lot of attention,
5. I trust and support my man,
6. I keep good eye contact when talking.

Eye contact is the most important thing when you're trying to bring someone home  seduce someone get your message across,
and enough eye contact will just be the final point
of getting that man/woman. 

Unless you're showing cleavage, which would be a challenge to keep their eyes contacted with yours. 

Well all that seems about right, but then I'm still single...

*Note: I do not come in all modes mentioned above. The modes are merely examples.

That's what J_Fish has to say~ Au Revoir~

p.s. Hey I don't know you, and this is sad, but here's my blog post, so please send me over to the Caribbeans so that I might find a super hot, tall, dark and handsome guy among the other winners who will be going there for 4 days 3 nights!! *Plays the hula and dances the ukulele.* 

Wednesday, 29 August 2012

A few things to get off my flats

1. Consensual or not, sex with a minor is rape.

If a national hero has sex with a minor, it's rape. That national hero should be stripped of his title and sent to jail and butt raped where he shall be careful not to drop the soap. If a person has a bright future, he/she should not put that brightness under risk and lure a minor into bed. If the person has such a bright future, it wouldn't be hard to get laid by someone who is able to make decisions without their parents having to sign a document in their stead. A nation will not be proud if the "hero" is a rapist that lures under-aged girls into bed, or anywhere else for that matter to have consensual sex.

2. Consensual sex with a minor is rape, no matter how many times you've done it before.

If a person performs sexual activities with a minor, it's rape. If every rapist is let loose because he/she is "young" and "a first time offender" then a lot of people would not be dubbed rapist.

First there was the excuse of "bright future", because he was in the national team. Then there was a drop-out, who was young. Being a 19 year old, the person should be expected to take responsibility for his actions. A 12 year old shouldn't be asked for sex.

3. Cheating

Cheating is bad because it's unfair. Cheating in exams or in relationships are equally bad. If you cheat and/or help others cheat, you should know it's bad. It might sound like "meh, we're not really hurting anyone", well talk to someone and you'll realize that you can't talk your way out. People will help you see your mistake. Talk to me if you don't believe it.

4. I get jealous when privileged girls rant/show off too much

Dear privileged girls, if you have a job, please don't rant about it everyday. I know you have the right to say anything on Twitter if you want to, but if you do it everyday, it's very annoying.

If you have someone to drive you around (e.g. a boyfriend or potential boyfriend or very generous friend or parent(s)), don't rant about traffic jams because it's stupid and very VERY annoying.

If you're really rolling on the floor in pain, but you can still tweet, it doesn't seem too bad to me. If you're enjoying life and would like the whole world to share your happiness, please, please do that in moderation because some people (I) feel jealous when they're (I'm) stuck in the office reading too many of your life-enjoying happy tweets.

If you post 5 pics (estimated) of yourself enjoying life on twitter everyday, but rant how life is unfair or how people should treat you better, you're an asshole, because God is treating your spoilt piece of ass better than a lot of starving kids. Unless you work hard for something and didn't get it, why do you think you deserve a better life than others? Because you're lucky enough to be born in a upper-middle or upper class family?

If you have the money to spend, by all means, do whatever you want with it, but don't go around calling others cheapskate for doing something you wouldn't do. Please understand that not everyone can have a good life like you do.

I would so much love to unfollow a lot of people on twitter if not because they're actually my friends.

Well of course everyone can rant once in awhile, but too much ranting is just sick.

5. On the other side of the spectrum, I have new hair colours. YAY!!

Did you see what I did there?

My hair colours? Note colours as in plural.

and so, voila.

Colour unedited. And I love how I look so fair in this picture. The top half is purple and the bottom half is red. The hairdresser actually told me these two colours when I said I wanted 2 colours. And then I got the instagram comments saying the 2 colours. =)

Well the purple is not obvious in this picture, but believe me, I have purple patches on my forehead near the roots of my hair because the hairdresser left it on for too long. If you look really close, you can see purple on the baby hair near my ear. Zoom in. Zoom in more.

When I washed my hair today I felt like a unicorn coz the water turned lilac when it ran through my hair.

6. Sometimes, I still cry when I think of him. Sometimes, I still miss him.

That's what J_Fish has to say~ Au Revoir~